Crisis Averted

Well, I nearly had to move out of the house this morning with nothing but the clothes on my back and possibly even leaving everyone behind. It went something like this. The previously discussed captured snake spent the night in a plastic jar, in the garage, on the saw table immediately beside the door to the house. I saw it there when I went out to check the chickens this morning. The lid, without holes was firmly attached, I checked, from a distance. A couple hours later we had been coming and going and the door that leads to the house was kept open. As I went inside for the last time I noticed that the jar was empty. Assuming that he let it go I called out to Ron, "did you get a picture of the snake?" He answered "no, not yet."

Me: "What do you mean not yet?"


Ron: "Well, I will as soon as I am done here!" Him irritated with me thinking that I was asking him to do it now.


Me: "Well, WHERE IS IT?" The shear panic is rising in my chest. I am looking at the empty container with the lid slightly ajar, the open garage door and remembering how difficult it had been to catch it in the first place.


Ron: "What do you mean 'where is it?'" Now he is running toward me as I stand there in horror.


Both of us turn to Sage and shout "what did you do with the snake?" Poor kid had no idea what we were talking about. "Nothing" she replies in complete innocence.


Me: "Oh CRAP, oh crap, oh crap!"

I had to censor what I really wanted to say since the girls were right there. I quickly brought the kids with me in the house and closed the door hoping and praying that it wasn't already in the house. I assumed that Ron was staying in the garage to try to find it. Turned out I was wrong to make such a stupid assumption. I quickly got ready for my appointment thinking of the gravity of the situation. What if it is in the house? It was small, about 10 inches and the diameter of about a pencil. It could go anywhere and not be seen for a long, long time and during this time it would be GROWING. What happens if it is in the house and it comes out when Ron isn't home. What do I do then? Could I barricade myself in a room until Ron came home by stuffing towels under the door? Probably not, it was small so it could squeeze in if it was going to try and get me. There was only one real option: I was going to have to move out until Ron could find the thing. I tip toe back towards the garage, visually scouring the floor as I went, to tell Ron of my plan to move out in the case that he hasn't found it yet. Again to my astonishment I carefully open the door and see Ron continuing about his business of doing whatever he was doing when I asked him where the snake was. Me: "Did you find it already?" Ron: "I'm not looking for it. There is no way I will find it now." That's it then, I will have to move out! As I am about to tell him about his new job as a single parent I look down and right there in the middle of the garage, there it is. It's just laying there. Now I am probably screeching, "it's right there, it's right there!" I am already running back inside the house now to get away from it. Ron is shouting at me to get the camera and I am shouting back "JUST GET THE SNAKE!!!" He did and I did. Here is the picture of the evil little thing. It is kind of blurry because my hands were shaking so much and because it was trying to escape. Anyway, crisis averted.